I got my first super soaker squirt gun today, floating down the St Joseph river. It’s a fine purple double barreled model. It made me think about the many things I have found floating along, or in shallow water or at put-ins.
What have you found floating by you while paddling?
Not floating, by any means, but the strangest thing I’ve found so far in the bottom of the river is a payphone.
Well, we took our new friends on the St. Francis River in the MO Ozarks the day before the “Official” start of the first “Ozark Rendezvous.” As we neared the take out, there was an odd shaped “Object” floating in the water. Upon closer inspection, it was a “Strap on” male appendage! We still talk about that one!
Boy, you guys find all the good stuff. I just find garbage and discarded camping equipment, which turns out to be garbage more often than not.
@wildernesswebb said:
We still talk about that one!
The Sinking of Good Vibrations
(Better To Be Strapped Than Broke)
An electric eel
of torrid appeal,
charged to aquatic sport,
but alas, mistake,
to plunge into lake,
for good sport’s now coming up short.
Many haunting items adrift in the river:
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jimwhite/objectsinmotion.html
Spotted this in Lake Arthur, north of Pittsburgh – looked like an alien brain (squishy solid mass). Turned out to be an unusually large colony of bryozoans or “moss animals” related to corals. They are a sign of a healthy freshwater environment:
The coolest find was a few summers ago, paddling the Monongahela, near downtown Pittsburgh, which passes under several bridges, some with pedestrian traffic. Spotted what looked like a Cheet-ohs wrapper afloat (orange, red and yellow mass) and went to retrieve it with my butterfly net since I try to skim and stash trash when I find it. Turned out to be a perfect long-stemmed red tipped yellow rose. Upon further paddling I came upon more – eventually collected 19 of them on my deck. Tried to imagine the scene that might have played out that caused them to be dumped in the drink – maybe an unsuccessful pleading by a lover with a guilty conscience? Rejected proposal?? But later I wondered if somebody had tossed them in as some sort of memorial and felt a little guilty about gathering them. But they looked gorgeous in a vase on my table for a week.
Found 2/3rds of a six pack of beer half sunk in a bunch of reeds once just below some rapids – somebody must have lost them in a yard sale. Coors Lite, unfortunately, so I left it on the ramp at the takeout (though I was tempted to use it to rinse the mud off my boots.)
Deer carcass.
Yup, dildos. Not once but twice. On the first occasion, a friend mounted the device to the nose of his kayak with duct tape for the remainder of the run.
So far I’ve found two kayaks (pool toy types) and two paddles. The paddles were separate finds and not related to the kayaks. One of the paddles is a Werner Skagit and the other is a 4 piece Chinese paddle that I can break down and fit the whole thing inside my sea kayaks for a spare. Other finds have been a whole bunch of tennis balls, buckets full of golf balls and numerous pfd’s. The oddest things are fresh fruits and vegetables in perfect condition. I cannot figure who would throw this stuff in the river, but I suspect it comes off Ships. Maybe the cooks have a food budget that gets cut if not used up, or who knows why.
Mailbox, complete with mounting frame. It was actually standing upright in an eddy. There was no mail inside.
Other finds: dead animals, towels, Frisbees, tennis balls, fishing poles, fish stringers, lures, paddles, pots & pans, all types of fruit, hats, sleeping bag, tarps, and an Army issue field jacket, Most paddles found in rivers are outfitter’s beaters.
Full bottle of Gordon’s gin(below a rapid). Poured it out; that stuff is nasty.
Varied type of beer; bottle & cans; trash it or give it away. I don’t eat or drink anything that came from the river.
What appeared to be a new tent; couldn’t get it loose from strainer where it was entangled.
Several canoes (outfitter’s “beaters” not worth the effort of retrieva). Wildernesswebb & I did find a nice Old Town on the Jack’s Fork river in Missouri. It was under 2 large strainers in deep water; no way we’d have ever gotten it loose w/o more help than just us.
My scientific study revealed that “river dorks” can’t keep a canoe upright, and very often carry large amounts of Bud Light in Styrofoam coolers. I give it away or throw it away; Bud Light sucks!
A tri fold belt pouch of Trout flies; must have been 20 different flies. Gave them away to a trout fisherman I encountered; I don’t fish.
He seemed very, very happy, and thanked me very, very profusel.
I’m betting they cost in excess of 150 bucks retail. Sure made his day.
A wallet with 2 dollars in it, but no paperwork of any kind.
I am always looking for old home made fishing gigs. Never found one, but a good friend found a really nice one on top of a log/brush pile on the side of a river. Had no shaft on it. Don’t know how in hell it hadn’t ended up on the bottom of the river?
Fun to look for “river treasure”.
BOB
Fun stuff. I’ve never found a pay phone or a mailbox or sex toys…but I think I’ve also found about half of the items that Bob has come across…including the bow of some unknown boat extremely well pinned on the St Joseph river. I’ve rescued quite a few fishing lures for fishermen while they are still standing on the shore, but never a trout fly.
I used to go for long upstream paddles on the (low and slow) Huron river in Ann Arbor…on stretches where rental canoes travel. I remember finding an open flip phone and I envisioned some smart ass boyfriend getting yelled at by his girlfriend. Also remember finding a $5 bill, then later a 10, then later a 20…$75 total after a 4th of July weekend. I got to practice my “how far do you dare to lean over in your solo canoe with a worried dog” skills. I’ve also found several of my best outdoor hats just floating downstream in the middle of the river.
Two of my last three water bottles and my current boonie hat were river gifts. Unfortunately the two water bottles were subsequently returned (after years of usage) to the river gods - one to the Flambeau at Beaver Dam Rapids and the other to the Jump River, I think…
Found lots of lesser stuff - A rusted can of Donald Duck soda pop and church keyed beer cans are kinda’ unusual and memorable.
Oh, and once on the Wisconsin River while sitting in a folding camp chair in waist-deep water one swelteringly hot summer day something hit my foot. A full bottle of Corona, it was.
Pat, that’s too funny. Isn’t Corona the company who’s TV ads are all about “finding your beach”, and who’s most-recent version of that theme is an ad showing a bottle of the stuff randomly making its way to people relaxing by the water?
Don’t recognize the commercial but perhaps I’m watching the wrong channels or something. This happened about eighteen years ago so it probably predated the commercial anyhow… I remember it spooked me a bit at first - first thought was of snapping turtles. Fella needs a drink after a scare like that…
@wildernesswebb said:
Well, we took our new friends on the St. Francis River in the MO Ozarks the day before the “Official” start of the first “Ozark Rendezvous.” As we neared the take out, there was an odd shaped “Object” floating in the water. Upon closer inspection, it was a “Strap on” male appendage! We still talk about that one!<
I wasn’t at the event wildernesswebb relates to nor the first “Official” Ozark Rendezvous but recall first Rendezvous Darryl and I came to. Camped in our van in parking area at the group campsite on Pulltite (?) with other regulars and probably a few newbies like us. Remember hearing that story around the first night as we sat on the hay bales around the campfire. Thought maybe we should pull out the van keys, hop right back in and drive right out of there. Just who were these people we decided it might be interesting to meet and paddle on the Current River in far away Missouri. If I recall correctly, Darryl wasn’t keen on driving the curvy roads at that time of night with no known place to lay our heads. We stayed, had a good time and returned quite a few subsequent Ozark Rendezvous.
Not a found item, but a lost one on another unofficial Ozark Rendezvous. Because OR was rained out, Terry and Margaret were kind enough to invite some of regulars to come to their farm and paddle some of the nearby streams. Paddling Big Creek, one of two tandem paddles in our 17 ft Wenonah Spirit Ii and relatively new to paddling faster waters, we were given wildernesswebb’s camera to take his picture. Before we could get it back to him, they was off (he and Margaret were other tandem paddlers, I think) down what they called shut-ins. We brought up the rear to go through that crazy boulder-filled section. We didn’t make it and got pinned. Camera disappeared into the drink, not to be seen again by us. Still feel a bit bad about that. I think it was his new camera.
Same event, different stream. One of our group found some 57 Chevy part (or some such vintage car) imbedded in the bottom and waiting patients to scratch up Doug’s canoe. No attempt was made to take that find home.
Have found a variety of items on trips to the Quetico, most rather routine; many knives, fishing tackle, tent pegs (many and common), a tent rainfly trapped under a large tree a week after a delrecho caused massage blowdowns (guys were able to work it out–nice one from a Eureka Timberline 4 Outfitter model), a pfd, maps (worried about those folks), nice nylon shirts, hats, paddling gloves, a nice fishing vest, various varieties of trail mix.
Our most memorable “find” was a canoe-less guide for a boy scout troop from Arkansas. His story as he related it to us: Troops first trip to Quetico so none of the leaders heeded advice to purchase their own set of maps so the guide had only set. In midafternoon after searching unsuccessfully for the next portage, guide decided to leave his scout troop at a small campsite on the small lake they were on to go off on foot looking for it. He didn’t find portage so kept bushwhacking and found the next lake (fairly large). Now early evening and he didn’t know how to get back (where was that portage?). He knew about the old fire tower on the other side of the lake so he swam/floated across (using in pants legs as floatation aids). He flagged us down the next morning as we paddling down this long lake (6-7 miles), after not seeing another party in 4 days. We agreed to transport this modern day voyager (he was wearing a shirt designed like they wore) through the rather rugged portage (which was actually a land portage, followed by a swamp paddle and another short land portage) back to his waiting troop. Troop leader even gave us each a great cup of coffee. Thereafter, the little unnamed lake they were camped on became for us “Lost Guide Lake.”
A bowling ball. Yes, they’ll float (just barely) in salt water. A nice brand new straw sun hat with tags still attached. It was floating high & almost entirely dry, so seemed like it had been lost just a few minutes earlier. Found it on my birthday. A big patch of rose petals, which I concluded was from someone’s ashes being scattered at sea recently.
I paddle around small marsh Islands near Hilton Head. On high tides I can paddle up creeks that seldom see humans.
I always wonder if I’ll find a body in there. That thought probably came from reading The Old Man and the Boy by Robert Ruark.
@canoeswithduckheads said:
@wildernesswebb said:
We still talk about that one!The Sinking of Good Vibrations
(Better To Be Strapped Than Broke)An electric eel
of torrid appeal,
charged to aquatic sport,
but alas, mistake,
to plunge into lake,
for good sport’s now coming up short.Many haunting items adrift in the river:
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jimwhite/objectsinmotion.html
Love your prose, TW! Interestingly enough, I’ve never found such an object without paddling with someone from Texas, South Carolina, and West Virginia (LOL)!
Thanks TW.
Hmmm? These are, Curious States of Affair
Beneath Lone Star
Gamecock
in a mountain state
comingled
confusion
perhaps to debate
should highland
meet lowland
to wild wonderful end
would the bellow
rose vex us
in no country for old men
