You obviously don’t understand
how GPS is supposed to work. It stands for Global POSITIONING System. It sends a signal to a satellite, which aims an x-ray camera back at you, and measures the movement (i.e. “position”) of your arms and legs. When you pay over $200 bucks for something, it should work, even indoors, if the X-ray cameras it is linked to are any good. Garmin has obviously not subscribed to the best satellite X-rays cameras, which should easily read through my roof. It’s not like its lead-lined or anything. They are ripping people off.
Ha, funny!
"It sends a signal to a satellite, which aims an x-ray camera back at you, and measures the movement (i.e. “position”) of your arms and legs. "
Yeah, sends a signal to a satellite… HAHAHAHA
Jay
spoof woof
I guess there wouldn’t be much traffic on a dedicated silly message board. It does seem unkind, not to mention oddly pointlessly time-consuming, to post absurdities just to take advantage of the kindness of strangers and the gullibility of people less sophisticated in pranksterism.
Puns, it turns out, are the second lowest form of humor.
joke
It’s a joke guys. geeez
hmm
My GPS works fine indoors, you got a defective one, go take it back to Toys R Us…
Try the Foretex 101
I picked one up for fifty bucks. Not flashy, but works fine.
you’re missing an accessory
…for the x ray cameras to find and identify you, you need to purchase the antenna, which will cancel out the effects of your foil beanie.
I used to have a foretrex
…but my parents had it removed
Worth a try
Where can I get that? It doesn’t seem to be sold at my local Wal-Mart.
Changes in latitudes
In order to make the GPS work properly you need to adjust it to the proper latitude. The Jimmy Buffet principle explains this effect and he’s discovered the problem behind your GPS showing you running in place. Clearly he’s referring to the condition you refer to in your OP since he discusses running in his theory. To solve the problem you merely need to change your latitude which will result in a corresponding change in your attitude towards the GPS. Since the theory is complex it is often useful to consume a few mararita’s while studing it’s effect.
“It’s these changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
With all of our running and all of our cunning
If we couldn’t laugh we would all go insane”
L
Doh…
is this a quiz ?
I am assuming from the brand (Garmin) you are talking about a GPS based unit. If you are not moving, you shouldn’t expect it to calculate velocity.
Holy cr@p
I know it’s a message board and something get’s lost in the translation from the written word. But has our nation become so focused that we can’t tell a joke when we seen one!
Dude where’s Coffee when you need him.
Randy
if you can’t find the foil beanie
– Last Updated: Aug-05-08 12:31 PM EST –
at your local Wal-Mart, try covering your pith helmet with Reynolds Wrap Release and form a swan antenna on top. You know, like they do when you take home food from a fancy restaurant.
Shine on, Kaps
Are you
pointing it at the satellites the proper way? I have a Garmin E-trex Legend and I’ve found that if I don’t point it right at the satellites it won’t work…and make sure you do it during day light hours while they’re still visible…
Perhaps it’s calibrated in
inches per minute. Put it on your back during sex and see if it records.
G_K
LMFAO
I don’t think Wal Mart has ever even considered selling foil beanies, as Wal-Mart stores are built with giant foil beanie roofing systems to protect the general populace.
Heard a rumor…
– Last Updated: Aug-05-08 3:50 PM EST –
Heard a rumor that aliens are stealing aluminum & copper parts from some of the satellites. May be affecting some of the satellite's functions?
The gray ones are some theiving little bast..ds.
I bought a new Garmin Pretext.
I assume it is working correctly.
It gives the appearance of quality.
Haven't tried the cloaking feature yet.
:^)
BOB
problem
you have to hold the face of the device perfectly perpendicular to Garmin’s stationary satellite. You should have received a 10" brass sextant with your purchase and if not, contact Garmin immediately.
Mine works fine…
“Obviously NOT made for the serious multi-sport athlete”
That is funny a “serious multi-sport athlete” that sits indoors on a stationary bike & a treadmill… HAHAHAHAHAHA!
If you were “serious” and an actual “multi-sport athlete”, you would be outside & more than just running and biking.
Go outdoors & it should work just fine.
Paddle easy,
Coffee