Keep your d@mn mitts off my boat! (Rant)

I would never think of touching another paddler’s boat without asking permission. As for the parents of the two entitled little rugrats mentioned below, they need a lesson in how to raise their kids. No excuse for that behavior. And if it was my canoe or one of my kayaks the little bastard was jumping and screeching in, there would have been more than polite words exchanged.


One time I’m launching at a small local lake and there’s a boy and his mom fishing maybe 30-40 feet from my put-in. I take the canoe down off the vehicle and set it by the water and go back for my gear and dog. I look over and the boy is actually lifting the front of my canoe (mom seems oblivious). So I let the coonhound out and she charges the kid (vicious bluff charge is #1 coonhound skill) so he drops the boat and jumps back a step, shaking. I said sorry if she scared you, she won’t hurt you but she was protecting her canoe.


Hang a sign on the canoe: I hear banjos!

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I also ride a Harley Davidson and same thing as far as look don’t touch. You can look all you want but don’t touch or you may be in deep stuff. Especially old time bikers you would be better off slapping their wife. Jim.

I slapped an ole biker’s wife,
she wore that squeaky leather.
Now she’s my cookin’ partner.
Says I panhead much better.

And her former beau?
He got a new tattoo,
where Roadster runneth over,
slap-happy crushed canoe.

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Old time bikers probably have tough wimmin.

A long time ago, I declared to myself a rule of thumb that no matter where I am my kayak is never out of my eyesight. Sometimes that isn’t even enough. One time a little boy walks up to the boat and kicks it and I was right there. Another time a dog relieved himself on my boat. Some people and animals have no respect.


The self-absorbed idiot made beeline.
Saw kayak and thought, “That should be mine!”
Without asking first,
He grabbed—forgetting this verse:
Curiosity killed the feline.

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Well, the dog was just being a dog. It wasn’t a sign of disrespect; he was just leaving a note for his fellow canines to sniff later.


One reason I have female dogs.

I wouldn’t blame the dog, but once one gets it, every other dog will do the same. Like on car tires.

We had a female dog who sometimes lifted her leg. We always figured it was because all her closest doggie friends and earliest doggie role models were guys :woman_shrugging:

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Maybe if you were a little more polite he would have asked. Get over yourself. Don’t leave your stuff unattended if you’re worried about “groping” (it’s just a boat).

Obviously you did not read the post with comprehension.

The guy went to my boat when I was in the bathroom, a short distance away. He had been around near the ramp before that, saw me carrying the boat back, saw me leave, and THEN proceeded to the boat to grab, knock, and whatever before I stepped out of the bathroom.

It was plain he did not want to ASK FIRST. He never waved, called out, or showed any sign of wanting to be polite—either before he went to the boat OR afterward. The rude one was the guy, in case you can’t figure that out. I was very polite to him given what he had already done.

He’s lucky he didn’t encounter a more hotheaded owner. And he probably banked on no threat from a small female…likely the reason he felt so entitled to grope.

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Maybe. I’ve seen a few female dogs lift a leg to pee, or even do a hybrid of squatting and lifting one leg slightly. Our female usually peed the normal way but on rare occasions she would lift a leg. Our male started out squatting when he was a pup and later usually, but not always, lifted a leg.

Whatever…letting the dog pee on someone else’s stuff indicates a neglectful or thoughtless owner. This was a problem at a farmer’s market where we used to live. Over and over we read complaints from shoppers who had put down a bag of purchases to pay for something else, and a dog peed on the bag or the food in it. Sometimes a dog would snatch a cheesy bread stick right out of a toddler’s mouth. Several writers said the dogs’ owners never even apologized or corrected the dog, let alone pay for the ruined foods.

Dogs got banned because of the continued bad behavior.

“Hey kids, get off my dam lawn!”

Ya the boat groper stepped over the line. Common sense etiquette would say, “Don’t touch what is not yours”. But your boat was apparently something new to this dude. Maybe you converted a jet skier :wink:

Cill people, learn to live with others.

When I was a new 2LT in the Army, my wife took our male dog to a post vaccination clinic.
She was in line with an older lady who she said had the bearing of at least a Colonel’s wife.
Our dog pissed on the woman’s foot. My wife was mortified but said the lady was very gracious.
No wonder it took me so long to get promoted. :sweat_smile: