That is certainly a more friendly solution than RPG or heat seeking missiles.
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We see lots of paddlers with very poor skills, but somehow they get by. Some of them travel in the boat lanes. I’m not sure why, but they miss all the fun stuff along the shore. It’s not my problem though.
What I really hate is noisy boats. Typically, but not always, these are diesel inboards that move at just a bit faster than we’re paddling (so the noise is around until they stop or we stop) or they’re cigar boats travelling at highway speeds on the water. The noise they make travels for a long way and given the size of the body of water we paddle on, can last for half an hour.
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The Pandamnit sucks!! It has been raining too much!
Gee, were we suppose to be complaining about paddling? I think a bad day paddling is better than no paddling unless you get injured badly or die! Of course loosing your boat or paddle might also qualify, but I have a few more than one of each… 
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To be a seasoned paddler, you need to convince your SO that you NEED more than one boat. I accomplished that years ago but Castoff has added sailboats to his growing collection.
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You’re Doing It Wrong If…
You park your auto in the parking spaces clearly signed/labeled as ONLY for tow rigs with boat trailers.
You and a friend parking your cars in that trailer space still constitute nontowing rigs in trailer spaces, so quit using that lame excuse, too.
This violation rankles especially so when there are still cars-only spaces available!
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I had my 16’ Hobie Cat out on the lake with a friend who had never sailed. We had stopped and were eating lunch out and away from the boating traffic, when an idiot…I am pretty sure that “Idiot” was tattooed on his forehead…started high speed runs within 20’ of us. Trying to hang on needless to say was extremely difficult and my friend strongly resembled Casper. Fortunately, moron left and we managed to stay up right. Lucky for him and me I didn’t have a gun with me. I truly believe I would have shot him.
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I do not compromise on safety issues, and I insist that people paddle as a team. Otherwise they can do what they want.
Wishing for wind on the ocean (or anywhere else) is a fool’s errand.
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You’re doing it wrong…if you think that a day on the water is the right time to talk about politics.
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You’re doing it wrong - what she said.
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I won’t repeat my tale of successfully tempting a gadfly jet-skier to ground out (you’ve likely already seen it on the forums) but I have also deterred others who were not as oblivious from following me into the low draft danger zone. Lessons learned from such instances have led me to venture out on our big Mississippi tributary rivers hereabouts on nice Summer weekends ONLY when the water levels are in semi drought state such that the sticky clay and sand accretions along the river bends I know so intimately are at just the right depth to pass a kayak over but shallow enough to hard-stop a swerving SeaDoo or powerboat whose operator thinks hazing paddlers beyond the shipping lane would be a hoot.
I met a guy who is one of those medieval re-enactors – he has a replica Viking crossbow (like pic below) and started carrying it on his deck whenever he kayaked a large local dam empoundment that’s always full of powerboat and jet ski yahoos who are prone to “counting coup” on paddlers with disruptive wakes. When such chaos pilots seemed to be targeting him he would shove his paddle under the bungees and pick up and aim the weapon. Claimed he had never had to actually load a bolt in it – the visual was sufficient to deflect any “attack” attempt.
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Mine has an up side and down side.
You’ll need to reverse those.
Mine actually has an up/down - left/right.
Ok, my initials and the year carved is burned into one face. For no functional reason I like to have that face as the power face right. That way I can read it and it is right side up. I care (sort of) the paddle doesn’t.
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Some may disagree…but I see no real downside to a good Greenland Paddle. 
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Can we believe you? Are you on the up and up?
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Come to think of it… I can get annoyed at folks who, after going down a narrow chute, hit the pool at the bottom and immediately turn crosswise to the current and go searching for their camera to get a shot of the next guy coming through the chute… the backpaddling brakes don’t really work that well for that second guy and there’s not usually much room for steerage. That’s an occasion where, with collision imminent, the phrase “You’re doing it wrong” leaps to mind. Eddy out, buddy.
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Willow, I’m surprised your friend with the crossbow hasn’t been arrested or sued.
For what could he be arrested? He doesn’t carry projectiles, just the empty bow. Not my “friend” just a guy encountered at a takeout, anyway.
I know Greenland style paddlers who keep trad accessories like an untipped Inuit target harpoon under their deck lines and have been thinking of making one for myself to practice with. Would I be arrested for hoisting one of those on the water?
I’m “sticking” with my Greenland paddle even if it doesn’t have a downside or upside. Left and right is just a matter of the perspective from the position you are when looking at it.
Not my job to fix other people’s lives. If they ask for help, I’m all there, otherwise, live and let live.