Local “Unanimous” Opinion
http://www.topix.com/forum/city/eminence-mo/TTECFSUT11NID1SNP
and:
http://www.topix.com/forum/city/eminence-mo/TGVRCP9HM45OHR265
And the prize goes to “Guest” from West Plains:
“Yep! Them there jack-booted gov’ment thugs are gonna call in the UN’s black helicopters and turn Shut Off the River.
They’re gonna goose-step up every creek and tributary and turn the valves off. The rivers will dry up! Shut off for good! There won’t be nothing left no more! Then they are going to post armed guards at every faucet so nobody can shut 'em back on.
All those “traditional uses” like racing up and down the river in 100 HP jet boats - gone. 2,000 horses a day crapping in the water - gone. Wall to wall drunken college kids blocking the river with tubes - gone. All them time-honored traditions that my family have enjoyed for thousands of years - gone.
You just wait! When them black helicopters start landing, you better be afraid!”
2nd Place: “Local Yokel” Ozark, MO
“Eminence - gone. Van Buren - gone. I like your way of thinking.”
Like I said before, Daniel Woodrell has a lot to work from in them hills and creeks. You just don’t dream up ‘Winters Bone’ in a vacuum. There is real talent down there.
Black helicopters?
I thought they were being replaced by black drones. One guy that lives near me believed the Iowa DNR was using helicopters to drop mountain lions all around Iowa. Now he thinks they’ll start using drones instead.
Actually Vic,
you scoff, but I have it on good authority the mountain lions are drones. Furthermore, I am convinced the wild horses have interbred with the elk the drones dropped. I haven’t personally seen any hork, but we were up there a few days ago and saw plenty of hork sign. Ask Peter.
Horks…
Haven't seen a hork on the Current yet, but have damn sure seen a plethora of "river dorks" there on Summer weekends.
Department of Conservation should consider an open season on river dorks; perhaps something similiar to the feral hog "population control" program. A mini gun, mounted on a drone might work quite well.
:^)
BOB
Well,
whadayathink the mountain lion drones are for?
Attend meeting if you can!
http://www.parkplanning.nps.gov/meetingNotices.cfm?projectID=15793
Rob and I will be at Kirkwood on Wednesday, this should be interesting!
Why not …
present testimony at the Salem and Van Buren meetings? Now that would be interesting. None the less, I appreciate your attendance. Thanks.
Drones
Out on the creek last Fall a thought occurred to me – what if the Sanity police started flying drones equipped with sanity detectors around the country to detect insanity. But then I got confused. Perhaps the Sanity police really represent an insane system. And they are attempting to ferret out the remaining sane people surviving in an insane system. And then I powered off my GPS. I mean everyone admits the freaking world has gone crazy but everyone lives like it ain’t and they ain’t.
Please help me with my confusion on the river. I go to the freaking river to stay sane and then this …
OK million dollar sellers have been composed on lesser themes. If I just had some ambition.
Creek Bum journals
gremmie…
Ever read The Monkey Wrench Gang by Edward Abbey?
Drones are “monkey wrench” worthy targets.
BOB
I wish I could
But for me the round trip would involve 9 or more hours of driving time plus however long the meeting lasted.
But you and Rob can certainly feel free to speak for me.
Or on second thought, perhaps it would be best for all not to mention my name.
Monkey Wrench Gangsta
Yes, I read the Monkey Wrench Gang. Need to reread it sometime.
Yes! Attacking drones is sure to become a growth sport! When the Amazon delivery drones made the news a few weeks past, some talking head postulated about the neighbor kids using them as targets for baseballs.
I guess I fell into it early on. Must be some atavistic instinct. Anything moving was a natural target for rocks, mudballs, tomatoes, snowballs, water balloons, tall ragweed spears, whatever. How we all survived childhood with two good eyes? Leading vehicles running 55 mph was particularly good game. Corn fields made great escapes from our highway ambushes. Man, if we’d have only had drones to attack then! Our arrows couldn’t reach the planes, but drones … yes! Stone age meet the digital age! YEEEEHAAAWW!
Amazon is gonna have to start running their drones in convoys protected by Black Hawk style fighter drones.
Meetings Postponed!
Because of weather!
Arrows & spear chuckin’…
That is not too far fetched…
In the early years of US involvement in Viet Nam; it would hot have been that unusual for booby traps designed to throw spears into helicopter rotor blades to be be found, rigged on prospective landing zones.
I’d have been more than happy to deal with spears; as opposed to assault rifles, machine guns, hand and rocket propelled grenades. Experienced all of the upgrades in person, but never dealt with a spear.
Colonel Kurtz sez, The horror! The horror!
BOB
Spear Days
’course could you replicate living in the days of spears and spear throwers, pre history and pre hierarchy, you would have been deceased for about 40 years now. Still a day to them, when they weren’t freezing or starving or dieing in childbirth or suffering the gauntlet of weaning, must have been an eternity at times. Kinda like a day on the river.