You Get The Boat You Wanted
By listening to your wife: Buy the “CHEAPO” like she suggested and give it the good old college try. Do the best you can with it and demonstrate all its limitations and how it is hampering you in fulfilling all your paddling aspirations. The key here is that you listened to her, respected her judgement, and tried it out, but it didn’t work out.
So tell her now that it didn’t work out, that you’re donating the “cheapo” and you’re buying the boat you always wanted in the first place.
Boat buying…
when my wife & I married in 1979, we started taking
a monthly stipend(a pittance)from our earnings to use as we chose too.
There was our money, her money & my money.
As the years passed, our salaries and our stipends increased.
I buy what I want, when I want; she does likewise.
No arguments regarding money.
I bought another canoe this month.
BOB
Wife always comes first…
Buy a cheap used boat, and once your are both sure this is not just a phase, I’ll bet she’ll agree to you getting the boat you want. Once you’ve had a little more time on the water, you may also have different ideas about the boat that you need.
.
You’re gonna name the boat after her, right? She won’t want her name on a cheap boat.
Jack approaches the Dark Side …
Once you SUP, you will never turn back. Can see your racing soon.
so try this…
are you really gonna go against her wishes and blow trust over a damn boat?
Try this… I’m never really satisfied until I get the THING (fly rod, shotgun, boat) that I REALLY want. If I pull the trigger and buy something cheap because that’s what I can afford, I’m generally not satisfied.
SO…pick out exactly what you want, and sit down woth your wife. Discuss what she’s willing for you to spend. Subtract an find the difference…
Then go out and take some part-time work, and save up enough to get what you want. You’ll be happy, she’ll be pleased that you worked together to find a solution.
And nobody feels like they’ve been slighted
Only if they have …
an over the hill class !
jack L
My ex wife gave me a choice
Her or the kayak… Kept the kayak. Expensive but worth it. Only regret is I did not protect my dog. Ended up eating him…
Current wife nags me a little to sell one of my kayaks. Wants me to get a lighter one. She worries about my back.
trade
There is, of course, the old and unkind tale where the husband got a brand new kayak for his wife. Nevertheless, he was quite satisfied with the trade.
Paddling rivers w/o a shuttle
You can do it, on a flat river (not whitewater). I paddle the Ohio River upstream until I get tired, then just float/paddle back down. Easy, fun.
Spouses should be supportive
– Last Updated: May-24-16 11:04 PM EST –
... unless there's a really good reason not to be. (Bills due, serious danger, etc.).
I have bought many used kayaks over the years, and sold them for what I paid for them (or in a few cases, for a profit). That way I didn't feel guilty when I wanted to upgrade, and a higher quality purchase would also be easier to justify to a spouse who didn't understand why one kayak is superior to another if you knew you could recoup your money or most of it. My husband has never complained about my spending on hobbies (but then, we each earn a decent income). I've never complained about his, except for the motorcycle. I worked in a hospital for a few years and saw too much of the fallout from that activity. Can't handle it.
Surely your wife has hobbies too (that hopefully you have been supportive of)? I have one sewing machine in particular that costs about 2.5 times more than I've ever spent on a kayak. ;) She must have something like that, that she can relate to...?
her
she is going against his wishes. That would be the day I would worry about what I bought.
paddling U
get her a paddle she may like to use it on you!
Serial hobbyists…
I’m one of those serial hobbyists that Celia is talking about. My wife affectionately refers to it as my Hobby Tourettes! Luckily, I have stuck with paddling for quite a while, although I have switched the type of paddling a couple times (recreational then on to WW and now on to sea kayaking). Being out on the water is my zen, and my wife understands that.
I have gone through this exact same kind of situation many more times than I care to admit through multitudes of hobbies. The problem is that I’m the type of person that, once I set my mind on something (e.g. a new hobby), I can’t just buy in with the cheapo toystore versions of whatever my hobby du jour happens to be. I always insist on starting off with at least intermediate-grade gear. So, that has led to me spending significant sums of money; sometimes on hobbies that end up not lasting very long.
Given my hobby history, my wife is often loathe to allow me to spend money on any new hobbies. However, I have found that my way around this impediment is to use old hobbies to finance the new. I will usually try to sell off gear from past hobbies in order to buy the “new”. As long as I can get enough proceeds to come somewhere within throwing distance of the price of the new, I can usually get the okay from my wife.
following up
Well after reading what you wrote, I sat her down and showed her what I wanted. I then showed her what people are selling them for used on Craigslist etc. You are right, kayaks hold their value. She was understanding about this. Her other gripe was if I get a kayak, I will spending all my time away from the family. I offered to get us all kayaks. She has no interests in kayaking or any other means on water. She does not have hobbies, other than stuff she does on computers. I “work” a job where I sit in a office most of the time, on a computer, so when I am home, I don’t really want to spend the remainder of the day on the computer. I went canoeing a couple times last month and that has really sparked my interests. I think we are going to basspro this weekend to “look” at some I am interested in. We will see how things go. I think she will come around. I do encourage her to do a hobby. She hasn’t found something she likes yet. Thanks guys/gals
You’re Doing the Right Thing
Involving your wife in this matter, for she just wants to be included and help you make the right decision. Never argue and never debate. It appears you have a win win situation, so tell her how much you appreciate her contribution.
Does
your wife value your physical and/or mental health? If not…Houston, we have a problem.
to buy or not
tell her 1-800-lawyer. I can’t believe it even needs to be discussed. Not like it’s a 50,000 dollar car or even a 3,500 dollar kayak.
It sounds like
she just needed to warm up to the idea. I’m like that too… I just need to process new things/ideas/information for a bit before I can jump on board.
Anyway, best of luck to you (both), and paddle safe!
Kayak = time away from family…
Unfortunately, your wife may have a good point with that one. That is a major point of contention in my household with regards to my paddling. My young daughters (10 and 4) are the most vocal about their dislike of me leaving to go paddling. So much so, that I recently gave up WW kayaking because of it.
I live in the Chicagoland area, and there isn’t any real WW venue anywhere near me. True WW is a minimum drive of 4-5 hours away. There is a small, easy WW play park on a small river near me, but even that’s over an hour away. So, for me to go WW kayaking, it was always at least a full day to a full weekend away from my wife and girls. It made my girls sad that their daddy was away, and I always missed them while gone. Because of this, I just didn’t get out kayaking as frequently as I would have liked.
So, I decided to give up WW kayaking and very recently sold my WW boat to buy a used sea kayak. I live only 5 minutes from the Fox River in my area. And can easily get to it almost whenever I want to go paddling. However, a WW boat on this slow-moving, flatwater river was a frustrating pain to paddle. I got a sea kayak so I can paddle farther and faster in the short amounts of time I get on the water.
Now, I go out paddling every weekend. However, I get on the water very early in the morning (~6am), paddle for 2-3 hours upstream and then back down, and am back home just as everyone else is starting to get up. I get my zen time on the water and I get to spend quality time with my family the rest of the day. Win/win for me!